A FIENDISH INSULT

But a microwave oven does have one major disadvantage: The frustrated paranoics don't understand how it works. It is therefore an insult to all technophobes; for anything that wasn't there before must be another fiendish concoction of technology. Until it is conclusively proven that it does not produce St. Vitus' Dance in victimized consumers, legislation is urgently needed to protect them.

Consumer Reports, which have long since become another consumer rip-off, now classify microwave ovens as "not recommended" unless door seals and other openings prevent all detectable leakage. That, in the first place, sets a standard not on the oven, but on the current sensitivity of detection equipment. And that is now so good that it can detect the microwave radiation produced by the body of whoever thought up that inept definition, for his body does produce it, and detectably so. The detectable leakage from a microwave oven is so minute that, to quote physicist Van Allen, "the hazard is about the same as the likelihood of getting a skin tan from moonlight." There is no evidence for such low levels (less than 1 milliwatt/cm2 two inches from the door, and falling off rapidly with distance) producing any kind of biological damage to humans.

And it is not due to lack of research that such evidence is absent. Ever since the 1940's, when powerful radars (far more powerful than a microwave oven) came into use, the question of microwave health hazards has been intensively studied. Early investigations raised the suspicion that high intensity and long exposure, in combination, could affect the retina (in the eye) and the testicles, causing temporary or permanent sterility. (At the time there were stories, possibly true, of radar operators charging a fee to open a waveguide window for GI's to "sun" their private parts for a few minutes before leaving on a weekend pass.) Later research confirmed these suspicions to some extent, though after three decades of intensive research, the matter is still controversial. But in any case, these are exposure levels higher than can occur through leakage from a microwave oven.

Microwaves are not radioactive; they are of the same type as used for TV transmissions. Severe brain damage can result from continuous exposure to the latter, but not due to physical causes.